Me and My Wild Imagination - Part 4 - A Quarter Life Crisis

I'm writing this 3 months and 4 days before my 24th birthday. I can say that a lot of things happened to me within that 24 years. There are people who came into my life and silently slipped away. I can't say I'm fulfilled right now, but I can say I'm looking forward for the next 24 years or so of my life.

I'm turning 24... geez, I feel too old for my age. I think my coming birthday wouldn't be as excited as my 7th, 12th, 13th, 16th, or 18th birthday. I'm not looking forward for that day.

People think that at this age, you should be more mature. Well, sad to say, I'm not. Yes, I provide for my family, but that's all. I still wake up at 1 pm during my days off, I still don't clean my room, I still don't follow my mom's orders, I still make reckless actions that I regret later on. Maybe the only mature thing about me now is that I carefully thinks things through before making a final decision. The last time I made a bad decision, I ended up regretting it.

I'm turning 24, and yet I'm all alone. OK, so I have my friends, and my family. But... I feel... well... alone... maybe sad... There are times that when my friends talk about their better half, even if they tend to complain about their boyfriends (insert sherrie's name here), I feel a little envy. I can't even remember the last time that I had a bf... hmmm... I guess it was way back in 2004. I'm not saying that I want to have a boyfriend, but the throught of being alone for the rest of my life just scares me. I don't want to end up like my spinster aunt who blames everybody for her misfortunes and lack of love life.

I'm turning 24, and there are a lot of things I want to do and finish. Diploma... who's that stupid person who invented such thing? I have to go through a lot of hardships and 14 miserable units to get a stupid diploma for my course. As usual, I have never started, and I'm too lazy to start studying again. My heart is not with CoE anymore... maybe there's a course out there that would interest me, but the lack of funds and time won't let me pursue it. I want to save money, I want to go to the gym, I want to be promoted, I want to trim down... but, as stated a while ago... I'm too lazy. God help me finish my nihonggo lessons...

24... hmmm... I feel a little weird about my age. when people younger than me finds out about my age, they will call me "ate". I hate being called "ate". I wish I could turn back time and become a kid again - no problems, no worries, and life is so simple...